Out of Joint -- Chapter 6 (Part 3)
Apr. 6th, 2005 09:52 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sharelleFirst of all, a very, very warm hello to new friends! If you’re here for the story, welcome! I hope it continues to please. (And a big, huggy thank you to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
thedeadlyhook for what was probably one of the nicest recs ever!)
This section was a few days later than planned due (as most of you know) to unexpected laptop crashage. It will also be a short while before the next update, since I’m going to need to rebuild some of my files when the computer is returned to me. However, I’m already picking away at it the old fashioned way – pen-to-paper. (I have a very set direction in which I hope to take this, and I don’t want to lose momentum.)
So when my computer comes back from the dead, if it’s corporeal enough, I’ll be getting right back to work. In the meantime, here is the last segment of Chapter 6. Enjoy! (Thank you again,makd for your generous assistance.)
All previous parts can be found here.
(Chapter 6 – Part 3)
* * *
It often amazed Rupert Giles how quickly silence descended upon the hallways of Sunnydale High School. Students, in their flurry to leave for the day, caused an uproarious swell of voices and shouting mixed with a cacophony of other noises – lockers slamming, feet stampeding down stairs and through hallways, the push-bar of the numerous exits clanging rhythmically as body after body shoved against them during the daily mass exodus. Lord, even the occasional cell phone ringing, even though the noisy contraptions were not permitted on school grounds. Undercover for the Council or not, as an official member of the SHS faculty, Giles should have strode out into the hallway to ferret out the rule-breaker, confiscate the phone, and redirect the perpetrator to Mr. Snyder’s office for detention. But, as on most days, the Watcher-turned-Covert-Librarian had other things on his mind than disciplinary procedure.
Almost immediately, the halls grew quiet once more, as was the case every day. With the possible exception of some of the faculty, a handful of students who stayed on school grounds to participate in various extracurricular activities and, of course, the maintenance staff, the building hastily emptied of most of its occupants. Luckily, it was an extremely rare occasion that any member of any of these groups ever needed to use the library after hours. Therefore, Giles was permitted almost completely uninterrupted time alone to research or to meet with his Slayer and her small group of young helpers, as was the case on most nights. Once school let out and silence descended, Giles often lost track of time and usually found himself laboring well into the evening without any thought of the drawing hours, working either by himself or with Buffy and her friends.
Tonight, he was by himself.
It wasn’t because the others hadn’t offered to stay. Buffy had, indeed, insisted that it was important for them to hit the books and discover anything they could regarding Spike’s recent stint with breaking-and-entering, but Giles could practically feel the relief radiating off her when he insisted that she go home and make certain her mother was protected tonight. Although the Slayer made a show of her distaste at being subjected to more of Joyce’s harrying over Buffy’s Calling, Giles could tell she was glad to be spending the evening at home for once. It was a shame it wasn’t under better circumstances.
Willow was more difficult to send on her way. Of course the girl wanted to check her own home and make sure she hadn’t had any of her own unwanted visitors, but as her parents were away on business, she was less willing than Buffy to stay in an empty house all night. Xander had offered to give her asylum at his place, which she gratefully accepted, but she also wished to return and help Giles in the research department. Eventually, Giles acquiesced, asking only that the pair come back later that evening, after checking the Rosenberg home and placating Cordelia by warning her to stay out of her car for a few nights. He was glad they’d be gone for a little while, at least. There was something Giles needed to do tonight, and he preferred to be alone to do it.
Giles had been flipping through the ‘Spells and Counter-Effects’ chapter of B. Cromwell’s Guide to the Darke Artes for the second time when a gentle tapping sounded upon the library doors. The Watcher glanced up and removed his glasses, rubbing slightly at one eye, which had gone especially bleary during the long period of reading. He blinked harshly, rose from his chair and walked cautiously toward the swinging double doors. He was gripped by an uneasy feeling as he neared them and the rapping came again, louder this time. Giles couldn’t remember anyone ever knocking on his door before. Not to come into the library. It wasn’t that type of place, not being a specific classroom or even an office. He didn’t notice anyone’s head framed in either of the circular windows which provided a view of the hallway beyond the doors, and as he reached them, he hesitated a moment before pushing one gently open. “Hello?”
Slowly, reluctantly, a figure stepped around the door, which protruded out into the hallway, coming face to face with the Watcher. She wore a sad yet hopeful smile, one that didn’t quite reach all the way to her eyes. She fidgeted absently with the tips of her fingers as she looked up at him, clearly nervous but not breaking her gaze. “You wanted to see me, Rupert?” she said.
Giles’ shoulders eased some of their tension and he pushed the door the rest of the way open, holding it ajar against one arm as he stepped sideways to clear the entryway. He motioned with his other arm for her to step past him. “Y-yes, Jenny,” he replied in a slightly stuttery mumble. “Er, please come in.”
Jenny Calendar stepped into the main room of the library, and Giles allowed the door to swing shut as he moved away from it to join her there. Searching for something to do with his hands, he drew out a handkerchief and rubbed briefly at his glasses before placing them back onto his face. For a moment, he looked at her and she looked back. Although he knew perfectly well why he had asked her to come here, and what they should be discussing right now, Giles was unexpectedly gripped with a sudden lack of wisdom as to how he should begin.
Abruptly, he stepped away from her and walked over to the large table at the center of the room, rummaging needlessly through the books there. “You didn’t really need to knock, you know,” he said.
Jenny shrugged, although with his back to her she knew Giles couldn’t see the movement. She took a few guarded steps toward him. “I got the message you sent with Willow,” she said, holding up a folded piece of paper she had drawn out of her pocket and worrying it between her fingers. The message, which had served as a late pass to first period, had also requested that Jenny come to the library before she left for the evening. “I guess I just thought if you didn’t hear me, it would be as good an excuse as any for me to make a stealthy escape.”
Giles turned to her. “Then why did you knock louder the second time?” he asked.
Jenny shrugged again. “I never was very good at stealthy,” she admitted with another smile, just as slight as her last in the doorway, but brighter, more genuine. It caused an unbidden grin to tug at one corner of Giles’ mouth as well. Small as it was, Jenny must have seen it, because she visibly relaxed somewhat.
Seconds stretched out for Giles as he looked at her. Lately, he never seemed to realize just how much he missed this woman until he stood face to face with her. She was so strong, so vibrant, so un-bloody-bearably beautiful he felt as though he was being torn to pieces. Last year, Giles the Stuffy Librarian had been more than a little reluctant to begin a relationship with Jenny the Lovely Computer Science Teacher, not only because of an obvious case of nerves, but also due to the need to keep a low profile as to why he was really working at Sunnydale High School. However, when Giles the Watcher became acquainted with Jenny the Techno-Pagan, who, it seemed, shared both his interest and his knowledge of the occult, many of the barriers which had prevented him from pursuing her were broken down. Unfortunately, it was only one of the many revelations about herself that Jenny was to make. Not all of them were nearly as pleasant.
It was later disclosed that Jenny Calendar had been sent to Sunnydale with an identity and an agenda . . . just as Giles himself had been. A descendant of the same family of gypsies who had cursed Angel with his soul over a century ago, it had been Jenny’s job to watch the vampire and, if necessary, to do everything in her power to prevent the curse from being broken. But it was not this secret duty that caused Giles to feel such betrayal; he was no stranger to keeping secrets about himself or his young charge. No, it was the fact that Jenny’s duty apparently included the attempt to cause a rift between the Slayer and Angel, an act that, since the woman had obviously not trusted Giles enough to inform him of the situation, had led to the curse being broken anyway. It was the hurt brought upon Buffy as a result that Giles was less willing to forgive.
Jenny’s third revelation . . . the one from the other day . . . had thrown him into a bit of a spin and Giles wasn’t quite certain he had processed the information, much less knew what to do about it yet.
I didn’t know I was going to fall in love with you.
If only they could come full-circle and be merely the Librarian and the Computer Science Teacher again. Giles may never have grown bold enough to make a move, but at least then their biggest disagreement would have been the Internet versus a good old-fashioned card catalogue. And even if he had mustered the courage, at least their most exciting date might have been a monster truck rally, as opposed to a monster hunt, followed by an accidental impaling with a crossbow. It would certainly eliminate the sheer pain of the distance now erupting between them, caused by the obligation to their respective duties. If only he could have foreseen loving this woman in return.
Because, God help him, he did.
“So, the reason you asked for me . . . .” Jenny’s voice brought him out of his thoughts and back to the library. “Willow said something about the book I gave you?”
“Y-yes,” Giles stammered, turning from her to locate the text among the others on the table behind him. “We were hoping you could shed some light on the spell we used to bar Angel from Buffy’s home. Any side effects or consequences that we should be aware of.”
Jenny reached out and took the book from him. The fact that the tips of her fingers brushed across his skin as he relinquished his hold on the small text was certainly not lost on Giles. On the contrary, the Watcher felt an electric tingle spread rapidly from the point at which their hands met, causing an abrupt plummeting feeling in his stomach. He needed to close his eyes against the sensation as he let his arms drop to his sides. When he opened them again a second later, it was to the sight of Jenny carefully leafing through the book, studying the pages and shaking her head slightly as she did so.
“I wasn’t aware that there were any negative effects to the eviction spell,” she admitted, keeping her eyes on the pages as she flipped metrically through them. “Of course, what I know is really limited to what I was able to find out in the research I did after Angel lost his soul.” Finally, Jenny raised her eyes to meet Giles' again. “Was there a particular side effect you were looking for?” she asked softly.
With her eyes on him like that, Giles could only nod mutely before actually gathering the ability to answer. “Er, yes,” he said, taking off his glasses and focusing his attention on them for a few moments. “Buffy arrived home last night to find Spike in her house. Apparently neither she nor her mother had invited him in.”
“Oh, my God,” Jenny muttered. “Are they all right?”
“Yes,” Giles replied, placing his glasses on his nose again. “However, Spike escaped and we’ve been researching the phenomenon for most of the day. So far we’ve been unable to find an explanation for how it could have happened.” He turned to the table again and began lifting a few books off its surface to display for Jenny, as though to prove the amount of investigation he’d been doing. “We’d theorized that perhaps, since it seems Spike was sired by Angel, the eviction spell had resulted in a trade-off of sorts, closing the door on one vampire while admitting entrance to another of the same bloodline.”
Jenny exhaled deeply as she traced a finger down the page the spell was on. She nibbled slightly on her bottom lip as she read. Then, with another small shrug, she looked up. “I don't know anything about any side effects to that spell, much less one like that. But I can tap other sources if you want, some of the ones I used to find this book in the first place. Maybe they’ll have some information we’re not seeing here.”
Giles nodded and glanced at the floor. “That would be . . . very helpful. Thank you.”
“Sure.” Jenny held the book out to him and, when he accepted it, she turned to go. She made it halfway back to the library doors before she stopped, standing motionless across the room from him without turning around.
“Rupert?” He didn’t answer her, but she knew she had his attention, so she continued. “Is this how we’re going to be now?”
Giles sighed deeply. Tiptoeing around what had been said the other afternoon was somehow worse than overtly fighting with each other. He gathered what he could of himself and took a few steps toward her as she turned around.
“Jenny . . . .”
“I mean, it’s okay,” she interrupted, glancing at the book in his hands, at the floor, anywhere but directly at him. “It’s what I deserve after what happened. I – I just want to know.” She toyed with the tips of her own fingers and stared at the pair of feet which had come to a stop little more than an arm’s span away from her.
Giles didn’t say anything, so she continued to forge ahead. “I guess I just wanted you to know that there’s nothing else. No other big secrets or surprises, . . . well, except maybe for the fact that I’m also a closet fan of professional wrestling.”
That got a breathy chuckle from the man before her and Jenny gathered the courage to look back up at him again. He was smiling -- only a little and it was sad, but it was there, and it reached all the way to the creases of his eyes. It was a look she hadn’t seen on him in weeks, not since before he had learned the truth about her. But, standing there now, he had the appearance of a man who was fondly remembering someone he had lost, someone he missed terribly. It tore at Jenny’s heart to see that look because the woman he missed, the woman he’d thought she’d been, had never really existed in the first place.
But of all the lies she’d told him, about herself and who she was, her admission from the other day had not been one of them.
Jenny loved Giles.
And if he could look at her with that kind of affection now, after what she had done to him and those he cared about, perhaps there was hope for her. It would likely be a long time in coming, but the prospect of it enabled her to smile back, weakly but hopefully.
“I know you probably have no good reason to trust me right now, but I just wanted you to know, Rupert, that what I told you the other day, I didn’t say it just to get back into your good graces,” she murmured, the smile fading away and her eyes beginning to glisten with a teary film. She blinked it back almost immediately, but Giles had seen it. He couldn’t recall ever having seen this woman cry before and, although she still technically wasn’t, the sudden naked vulnerability she displayed endeared him to her even more.
It was settled. He was done for. He wasn’t certain when it had happened, but at some point he had opened the door to his heart and she had deftly slipped inside. And whether they managed to forgive each other tomorrow or a year from now, one thing was not going to change:
Giles loved Jenny.
He had been so preoccupied by his own confirmation that he hadn’t realized she’d still been speaking.
“And, Rupert, I know it will be a while before you can completely trust me again, if ever, but I’ll be here any time you need me. I have access to a lot of information that can help you and Buffy, and just because I lo— . . . , just because I said what I said the other day doesn’t mean I’m going to let that affect . . . work-related . . . things. I promise I won’t let you down. Not again. And I . . . .”
“Jenny,” Giles gently stopped her. In hindsight, he probably should have allowed her to continue, since he really didn’t have anything to say in response. But the abject remorse in her voice and playing across her face as she spoke her penance made it necessary for Giles to interrupt.
And it was probably because he didn’t have anything perceptive or reassuring to say that he instead took a small step toward her, allowing his arm to bridge the space between them as he slowly reached for her and drew her to him. The smile slipped from his face as Jenny’s body contacted his and her eyes seemed momentarily frightened. Giles shut out the vision as his own eyes closed and he lowered his head to hers, placing a tender yet tentative kiss on her lips.
Jenny whimpered slightly, and Giles felt her hands glide up the lengths of his arms as she hesitantly began to respond to the soft pull of his mouth. Although it paralleled the shyness of the first one they had shared, for Giles the kiss was as natural as coming home. And although there was much to be dealt with in terms of past transgressions, one thing that Giles could trust without fail was his love for her. And hers for him.
Giles tightened his hold against the small of Jenny’s back with one hand, his fingers twining loosely into the folds of her blouse. He allowed the book he had been holding in his other hand to slide from his limp grasp and onto the floor as his palm came up to settle against the cradle of her jawline. He began to taste a subtle yet distinctive salty tang upon his tongue, which he could only guess were the tears he had never actually seen fall from her eyes. The two remained that way, gently kissing, until Jenny at last angled her face downward to rest her forehead against his.
Neither of them spoke for several moments. Then, sniffing softly and averting her eyes, Jenny bent down to retrieve the book Giles had allowed to fall to the floor. She wiped hastily at her face and by the time she was on her feet again, her features were clean and dry. She smiled at Giles, this time her eyes bearing a small but undeniable twinkle. Giles couldn’t tell if it was merely from the leftover tears, or from the new beginnings of the same joy he was starting to feel, but it didn’t matter. Either way, the woman was utterly stunning.
Jenny proffered the book to him and Giles accepted it, looking down only for a moment as he did so, then bringing his eyes immediately back to hers. “I’ll see what I can find out about the spell,” she reiterated, backing a few steps toward the library exit. “And, Rupert,” she added as she placed her hand upon the door, “I hope you know that I meant what I said. Every word.”
Giles smiled. “That you won’t let me down,” he offered.
“That,” Jenny nodded, her eyes cast demurely downward. “And that I do love you.” Without waiting for his reply, she eased the door open and slipped out of the room, leaving him to gaze after her.
Giles inhaled. Jenny’s presence and her words hung in the air like a sweet-scented anodyne, capable of easing his wounded heart. For the first time in many weeks, he felt as though things would work themselves out, somehow. He took in the sight of the spot where she had been standing. “And I, you,” he whispered into the empty library.
After a moment, he gripped the book firmly with both hands and turned to place it back among the others on the table. Jenny would be doing her part on her computer, no doubt, and therefore so would he. Minus the modern technology part, of course. There were still a few books which dealt with spells and their effects that he hadn’t yet had the chance to peruse. But just as he was about to settle himself at the table again, there came another gentle knocking upon the library door.
Giles grinned at Jenny’s actions, knocking again as though it had become routine. He briefly wondered why she had turned herself around so quickly, though some small wanton region of his brain was willing to offer up a guess. Giles’ grin spread even wider as he quickly made his way over to the entrance, sliding his fingertips between the crack that separated the two doors and quickly pushing one open.
But it wasn’t Jenny.
Giles’ smile fled from his face quicker than he could blink at the sight of what stood beyond the door. He was overcome with an immediate feeling of utter terror and his blood chilled in his veins. His eyes widened as they met the predatory stare and smile of the creature who now leaned casually against the open door.
“Hello, Rupert,” Spike grinned.
* * *
To be continued . . .
thedeadlyhook for what was probably one of the nicest recs ever!) This section was a few days later than planned due (as most of you know) to unexpected laptop crashage. It will also be a short while before the next update, since I’m going to need to rebuild some of my files when the computer is returned to me. However, I’m already picking away at it the old fashioned way – pen-to-paper. (I have a very set direction in which I hope to take this, and I don’t want to lose momentum.)
So when my computer comes back from the dead, if it’s corporeal enough, I’ll be getting right back to work. In the meantime, here is the last segment of Chapter 6. Enjoy! (Thank you again,
makd for your generous assistance.)All previous parts can be found here.
(Chapter 6 – Part 3)
It often amazed Rupert Giles how quickly silence descended upon the hallways of Sunnydale High School. Students, in their flurry to leave for the day, caused an uproarious swell of voices and shouting mixed with a cacophony of other noises – lockers slamming, feet stampeding down stairs and through hallways, the push-bar of the numerous exits clanging rhythmically as body after body shoved against them during the daily mass exodus. Lord, even the occasional cell phone ringing, even though the noisy contraptions were not permitted on school grounds. Undercover for the Council or not, as an official member of the SHS faculty, Giles should have strode out into the hallway to ferret out the rule-breaker, confiscate the phone, and redirect the perpetrator to Mr. Snyder’s office for detention. But, as on most days, the Watcher-turned-Covert-Librarian had other things on his mind than disciplinary procedure.
Almost immediately, the halls grew quiet once more, as was the case every day. With the possible exception of some of the faculty, a handful of students who stayed on school grounds to participate in various extracurricular activities and, of course, the maintenance staff, the building hastily emptied of most of its occupants. Luckily, it was an extremely rare occasion that any member of any of these groups ever needed to use the library after hours. Therefore, Giles was permitted almost completely uninterrupted time alone to research or to meet with his Slayer and her small group of young helpers, as was the case on most nights. Once school let out and silence descended, Giles often lost track of time and usually found himself laboring well into the evening without any thought of the drawing hours, working either by himself or with Buffy and her friends.
Tonight, he was by himself.
It wasn’t because the others hadn’t offered to stay. Buffy had, indeed, insisted that it was important for them to hit the books and discover anything they could regarding Spike’s recent stint with breaking-and-entering, but Giles could practically feel the relief radiating off her when he insisted that she go home and make certain her mother was protected tonight. Although the Slayer made a show of her distaste at being subjected to more of Joyce’s harrying over Buffy’s Calling, Giles could tell she was glad to be spending the evening at home for once. It was a shame it wasn’t under better circumstances.
Willow was more difficult to send on her way. Of course the girl wanted to check her own home and make sure she hadn’t had any of her own unwanted visitors, but as her parents were away on business, she was less willing than Buffy to stay in an empty house all night. Xander had offered to give her asylum at his place, which she gratefully accepted, but she also wished to return and help Giles in the research department. Eventually, Giles acquiesced, asking only that the pair come back later that evening, after checking the Rosenberg home and placating Cordelia by warning her to stay out of her car for a few nights. He was glad they’d be gone for a little while, at least. There was something Giles needed to do tonight, and he preferred to be alone to do it.
Giles had been flipping through the ‘Spells and Counter-Effects’ chapter of B. Cromwell’s Guide to the Darke Artes for the second time when a gentle tapping sounded upon the library doors. The Watcher glanced up and removed his glasses, rubbing slightly at one eye, which had gone especially bleary during the long period of reading. He blinked harshly, rose from his chair and walked cautiously toward the swinging double doors. He was gripped by an uneasy feeling as he neared them and the rapping came again, louder this time. Giles couldn’t remember anyone ever knocking on his door before. Not to come into the library. It wasn’t that type of place, not being a specific classroom or even an office. He didn’t notice anyone’s head framed in either of the circular windows which provided a view of the hallway beyond the doors, and as he reached them, he hesitated a moment before pushing one gently open. “Hello?”
Slowly, reluctantly, a figure stepped around the door, which protruded out into the hallway, coming face to face with the Watcher. She wore a sad yet hopeful smile, one that didn’t quite reach all the way to her eyes. She fidgeted absently with the tips of her fingers as she looked up at him, clearly nervous but not breaking her gaze. “You wanted to see me, Rupert?” she said.
Giles’ shoulders eased some of their tension and he pushed the door the rest of the way open, holding it ajar against one arm as he stepped sideways to clear the entryway. He motioned with his other arm for her to step past him. “Y-yes, Jenny,” he replied in a slightly stuttery mumble. “Er, please come in.”
Jenny Calendar stepped into the main room of the library, and Giles allowed the door to swing shut as he moved away from it to join her there. Searching for something to do with his hands, he drew out a handkerchief and rubbed briefly at his glasses before placing them back onto his face. For a moment, he looked at her and she looked back. Although he knew perfectly well why he had asked her to come here, and what they should be discussing right now, Giles was unexpectedly gripped with a sudden lack of wisdom as to how he should begin.
Abruptly, he stepped away from her and walked over to the large table at the center of the room, rummaging needlessly through the books there. “You didn’t really need to knock, you know,” he said.
Jenny shrugged, although with his back to her she knew Giles couldn’t see the movement. She took a few guarded steps toward him. “I got the message you sent with Willow,” she said, holding up a folded piece of paper she had drawn out of her pocket and worrying it between her fingers. The message, which had served as a late pass to first period, had also requested that Jenny come to the library before she left for the evening. “I guess I just thought if you didn’t hear me, it would be as good an excuse as any for me to make a stealthy escape.”
Giles turned to her. “Then why did you knock louder the second time?” he asked.
Jenny shrugged again. “I never was very good at stealthy,” she admitted with another smile, just as slight as her last in the doorway, but brighter, more genuine. It caused an unbidden grin to tug at one corner of Giles’ mouth as well. Small as it was, Jenny must have seen it, because she visibly relaxed somewhat.
Seconds stretched out for Giles as he looked at her. Lately, he never seemed to realize just how much he missed this woman until he stood face to face with her. She was so strong, so vibrant, so un-bloody-bearably beautiful he felt as though he was being torn to pieces. Last year, Giles the Stuffy Librarian had been more than a little reluctant to begin a relationship with Jenny the Lovely Computer Science Teacher, not only because of an obvious case of nerves, but also due to the need to keep a low profile as to why he was really working at Sunnydale High School. However, when Giles the Watcher became acquainted with Jenny the Techno-Pagan, who, it seemed, shared both his interest and his knowledge of the occult, many of the barriers which had prevented him from pursuing her were broken down. Unfortunately, it was only one of the many revelations about herself that Jenny was to make. Not all of them were nearly as pleasant.
It was later disclosed that Jenny Calendar had been sent to Sunnydale with an identity and an agenda . . . just as Giles himself had been. A descendant of the same family of gypsies who had cursed Angel with his soul over a century ago, it had been Jenny’s job to watch the vampire and, if necessary, to do everything in her power to prevent the curse from being broken. But it was not this secret duty that caused Giles to feel such betrayal; he was no stranger to keeping secrets about himself or his young charge. No, it was the fact that Jenny’s duty apparently included the attempt to cause a rift between the Slayer and Angel, an act that, since the woman had obviously not trusted Giles enough to inform him of the situation, had led to the curse being broken anyway. It was the hurt brought upon Buffy as a result that Giles was less willing to forgive.
Jenny’s third revelation . . . the one from the other day . . . had thrown him into a bit of a spin and Giles wasn’t quite certain he had processed the information, much less knew what to do about it yet.
I didn’t know I was going to fall in love with you.
If only they could come full-circle and be merely the Librarian and the Computer Science Teacher again. Giles may never have grown bold enough to make a move, but at least then their biggest disagreement would have been the Internet versus a good old-fashioned card catalogue. And even if he had mustered the courage, at least their most exciting date might have been a monster truck rally, as opposed to a monster hunt, followed by an accidental impaling with a crossbow. It would certainly eliminate the sheer pain of the distance now erupting between them, caused by the obligation to their respective duties. If only he could have foreseen loving this woman in return.
Because, God help him, he did.
“So, the reason you asked for me . . . .” Jenny’s voice brought him out of his thoughts and back to the library. “Willow said something about the book I gave you?”
“Y-yes,” Giles stammered, turning from her to locate the text among the others on the table behind him. “We were hoping you could shed some light on the spell we used to bar Angel from Buffy’s home. Any side effects or consequences that we should be aware of.”
Jenny reached out and took the book from him. The fact that the tips of her fingers brushed across his skin as he relinquished his hold on the small text was certainly not lost on Giles. On the contrary, the Watcher felt an electric tingle spread rapidly from the point at which their hands met, causing an abrupt plummeting feeling in his stomach. He needed to close his eyes against the sensation as he let his arms drop to his sides. When he opened them again a second later, it was to the sight of Jenny carefully leafing through the book, studying the pages and shaking her head slightly as she did so.
“I wasn’t aware that there were any negative effects to the eviction spell,” she admitted, keeping her eyes on the pages as she flipped metrically through them. “Of course, what I know is really limited to what I was able to find out in the research I did after Angel lost his soul.” Finally, Jenny raised her eyes to meet Giles' again. “Was there a particular side effect you were looking for?” she asked softly.
With her eyes on him like that, Giles could only nod mutely before actually gathering the ability to answer. “Er, yes,” he said, taking off his glasses and focusing his attention on them for a few moments. “Buffy arrived home last night to find Spike in her house. Apparently neither she nor her mother had invited him in.”
“Oh, my God,” Jenny muttered. “Are they all right?”
“Yes,” Giles replied, placing his glasses on his nose again. “However, Spike escaped and we’ve been researching the phenomenon for most of the day. So far we’ve been unable to find an explanation for how it could have happened.” He turned to the table again and began lifting a few books off its surface to display for Jenny, as though to prove the amount of investigation he’d been doing. “We’d theorized that perhaps, since it seems Spike was sired by Angel, the eviction spell had resulted in a trade-off of sorts, closing the door on one vampire while admitting entrance to another of the same bloodline.”
Jenny exhaled deeply as she traced a finger down the page the spell was on. She nibbled slightly on her bottom lip as she read. Then, with another small shrug, she looked up. “I don't know anything about any side effects to that spell, much less one like that. But I can tap other sources if you want, some of the ones I used to find this book in the first place. Maybe they’ll have some information we’re not seeing here.”
Giles nodded and glanced at the floor. “That would be . . . very helpful. Thank you.”
“Sure.” Jenny held the book out to him and, when he accepted it, she turned to go. She made it halfway back to the library doors before she stopped, standing motionless across the room from him without turning around.
“Rupert?” He didn’t answer her, but she knew she had his attention, so she continued. “Is this how we’re going to be now?”
Giles sighed deeply. Tiptoeing around what had been said the other afternoon was somehow worse than overtly fighting with each other. He gathered what he could of himself and took a few steps toward her as she turned around.
“Jenny . . . .”
“I mean, it’s okay,” she interrupted, glancing at the book in his hands, at the floor, anywhere but directly at him. “It’s what I deserve after what happened. I – I just want to know.” She toyed with the tips of her own fingers and stared at the pair of feet which had come to a stop little more than an arm’s span away from her.
Giles didn’t say anything, so she continued to forge ahead. “I guess I just wanted you to know that there’s nothing else. No other big secrets or surprises, . . . well, except maybe for the fact that I’m also a closet fan of professional wrestling.”
That got a breathy chuckle from the man before her and Jenny gathered the courage to look back up at him again. He was smiling -- only a little and it was sad, but it was there, and it reached all the way to the creases of his eyes. It was a look she hadn’t seen on him in weeks, not since before he had learned the truth about her. But, standing there now, he had the appearance of a man who was fondly remembering someone he had lost, someone he missed terribly. It tore at Jenny’s heart to see that look because the woman he missed, the woman he’d thought she’d been, had never really existed in the first place.
But of all the lies she’d told him, about herself and who she was, her admission from the other day had not been one of them.
Jenny loved Giles.
And if he could look at her with that kind of affection now, after what she had done to him and those he cared about, perhaps there was hope for her. It would likely be a long time in coming, but the prospect of it enabled her to smile back, weakly but hopefully.
“I know you probably have no good reason to trust me right now, but I just wanted you to know, Rupert, that what I told you the other day, I didn’t say it just to get back into your good graces,” she murmured, the smile fading away and her eyes beginning to glisten with a teary film. She blinked it back almost immediately, but Giles had seen it. He couldn’t recall ever having seen this woman cry before and, although she still technically wasn’t, the sudden naked vulnerability she displayed endeared him to her even more.
It was settled. He was done for. He wasn’t certain when it had happened, but at some point he had opened the door to his heart and she had deftly slipped inside. And whether they managed to forgive each other tomorrow or a year from now, one thing was not going to change:
Giles loved Jenny.
He had been so preoccupied by his own confirmation that he hadn’t realized she’d still been speaking.
“And, Rupert, I know it will be a while before you can completely trust me again, if ever, but I’ll be here any time you need me. I have access to a lot of information that can help you and Buffy, and just because I lo— . . . , just because I said what I said the other day doesn’t mean I’m going to let that affect . . . work-related . . . things. I promise I won’t let you down. Not again. And I . . . .”
“Jenny,” Giles gently stopped her. In hindsight, he probably should have allowed her to continue, since he really didn’t have anything to say in response. But the abject remorse in her voice and playing across her face as she spoke her penance made it necessary for Giles to interrupt.
And it was probably because he didn’t have anything perceptive or reassuring to say that he instead took a small step toward her, allowing his arm to bridge the space between them as he slowly reached for her and drew her to him. The smile slipped from his face as Jenny’s body contacted his and her eyes seemed momentarily frightened. Giles shut out the vision as his own eyes closed and he lowered his head to hers, placing a tender yet tentative kiss on her lips.
Jenny whimpered slightly, and Giles felt her hands glide up the lengths of his arms as she hesitantly began to respond to the soft pull of his mouth. Although it paralleled the shyness of the first one they had shared, for Giles the kiss was as natural as coming home. And although there was much to be dealt with in terms of past transgressions, one thing that Giles could trust without fail was his love for her. And hers for him.
Giles tightened his hold against the small of Jenny’s back with one hand, his fingers twining loosely into the folds of her blouse. He allowed the book he had been holding in his other hand to slide from his limp grasp and onto the floor as his palm came up to settle against the cradle of her jawline. He began to taste a subtle yet distinctive salty tang upon his tongue, which he could only guess were the tears he had never actually seen fall from her eyes. The two remained that way, gently kissing, until Jenny at last angled her face downward to rest her forehead against his.
Neither of them spoke for several moments. Then, sniffing softly and averting her eyes, Jenny bent down to retrieve the book Giles had allowed to fall to the floor. She wiped hastily at her face and by the time she was on her feet again, her features were clean and dry. She smiled at Giles, this time her eyes bearing a small but undeniable twinkle. Giles couldn’t tell if it was merely from the leftover tears, or from the new beginnings of the same joy he was starting to feel, but it didn’t matter. Either way, the woman was utterly stunning.
Jenny proffered the book to him and Giles accepted it, looking down only for a moment as he did so, then bringing his eyes immediately back to hers. “I’ll see what I can find out about the spell,” she reiterated, backing a few steps toward the library exit. “And, Rupert,” she added as she placed her hand upon the door, “I hope you know that I meant what I said. Every word.”
Giles smiled. “That you won’t let me down,” he offered.
“That,” Jenny nodded, her eyes cast demurely downward. “And that I do love you.” Without waiting for his reply, she eased the door open and slipped out of the room, leaving him to gaze after her.
Giles inhaled. Jenny’s presence and her words hung in the air like a sweet-scented anodyne, capable of easing his wounded heart. For the first time in many weeks, he felt as though things would work themselves out, somehow. He took in the sight of the spot where she had been standing. “And I, you,” he whispered into the empty library.
After a moment, he gripped the book firmly with both hands and turned to place it back among the others on the table. Jenny would be doing her part on her computer, no doubt, and therefore so would he. Minus the modern technology part, of course. There were still a few books which dealt with spells and their effects that he hadn’t yet had the chance to peruse. But just as he was about to settle himself at the table again, there came another gentle knocking upon the library door.
Giles grinned at Jenny’s actions, knocking again as though it had become routine. He briefly wondered why she had turned herself around so quickly, though some small wanton region of his brain was willing to offer up a guess. Giles’ grin spread even wider as he quickly made his way over to the entrance, sliding his fingertips between the crack that separated the two doors and quickly pushing one open.
But it wasn’t Jenny.
Giles’ smile fled from his face quicker than he could blink at the sight of what stood beyond the door. He was overcome with an immediate feeling of utter terror and his blood chilled in his veins. His eyes widened as they met the predatory stare and smile of the creature who now leaned casually against the open door.
“Hello, Rupert,” Spike grinned.
To be continued . . .
(no subject)
Date: 2005-04-07 12:20 pm (UTC)Great Stuff
TheBear
(no subject)
Date: 2005-04-08 03:26 am (UTC)