Me and my Mary Sue
Aug. 6th, 2005 03:02 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sharelleI got this very funny idea from ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
cleolinda. And since it's late – and I'm wide awake – I thought I'd put some goofiness together for your amusement.
Mary Sue Meme
1. Go to the Elouai doll maker.
2. Make an ordinary doll of yourself and save it.
3. Take that doll and, leaving a couple things (nose, eyebrows, whatever) the same, Mary Sue yourself. Make the most blatant Mary Sue you can conceive.
4. Post "Before" and "After" in your LJ. Bonus points if your Sue has a back-story of some sort.
Well, all right!
So firstly, here's the dolly that more-or-less has my features. She's got my current thing for pink. And the hair, while a bit darker blonde than my natural shade, is basically close. Too bad not every day is a Sue-hair day!
And now, I shall give her a total Mary Sue makeover and send her on a Sunnydale adventure . . . .
Sharelle Rummi – A Tale of a Slayer
Hi. My name is Sharelle, and all my life I've been an orphan.
For sixteen years, I never knew the love of a parent or a single friend.
Oh, woe. Woe!
My full name is actually Sharelle Papillion Morningstar Bonita
MahRee Soosan Rummi, which is written out (in very small letters)
on the back of the silver cross I always wear around my neck. It is my
only real possession, and my only clue as to who I really am.
I've always been a tomboy – as you can see by my spunky braids and
backwards cap – but I have a gentle soul and a heart of gold. I've
lived on the street all my life, with nothing to wear but a biohazard barrel.
But that all changed the day a man named Rupert Giles told me I was a Vampire Slayer.
Oh, look how well I clean up! My nicer clothes now enhance my
cerulean-winter-sky eyes and my sun-kissed golden hair tousled
luxuriously about my shoulders.
Mr. Giles tells me I'm a very different kind of Slayer.
Not only can I wield my weapons using only the sheer force of my mental will…
But I'm also way more studious than his other Slayers – Buffy and Faith.
He's already told me how much he admires the fact that I call him
Mr. Giles, and not just by his last name like some people he knows.
I've enrolled in classes at Sunnydale High, and Mr. Giles trains
me as a Slayer after school. However, he tells me that, since I'm
already an expert in just about every weapon in existence, he wants
me to help him train the other Slayers.
I get quite a reception from the student body on my first day.
(And my hair unexplainably changes color. I currently have
simmering titian tresses cascading down my back.) Buffy,
the other Slayer, asks to be my best friend.
The other students seem to feel the same way . . .
. . . and a girl named Cordelia instantly gives me her
position as captain of the cheerleading squad.
Oh, and have I mentioned my suave British accent?
Or the fact that nearly every guy in school wants to date me?
Including one boy namedZander Xander,
who loves the fact that I'm not afraid of bunnies like his last girlfriend.
All this, and I still find time to pursue my career as a swimsuit model.
But, of course, my Slayer duties come first.
(I love finding new and innovative ways of hiding my stake.)
Yep, I don't take no guff when I'm Slaying.
Mr. Giles says he wishes Buffy embraced
her duty as much as I have.
Plus, I'm really great with children.
I also happen to be one of the most powerful witches in the world.
(In fact, I may have to travel as an exchange student for a
few weeks to do the requisite crossover at Hogwarts.
They would need someone with my abilities, after all.)
I can communicate with animals.
Probably because I'm part wood nymph…
and I have mermaid blood…
as well as demon…
and my mother may or may not have been J. Lo.
Yes, the specific details of my ancestry remain a mystery.
One thing is certain – I'm part vampire.
My great-great-great-great grandmother was almost sired
by a vampire, but she lived. And ever since then, women
in my family have certain vampire characteristics, but none
of their weaknesses. I have ruby-red eyes instead of yellow;
I don't get bumpies on my face like most vampires; I'm also
immune to sunlight, crosses, and holy water.
In short: I'm still darn cute.
Faith didn't trust me at first, so she staked me through the heart.
But I lived because of my super-accelerated healing powers.
Now we're, like, best friends.
In fact, I'm the only one she relates to, and I'm the only
one who can keep her in line.
She even lets me borrow her clothes. (Although I usually make my own.)
I recently started dating Spike. He likes it when I dress like this,
and he says my copious glimmering tresses are the closest
he's been to actual sunlight in over a century.
After he met me, he started writing poetry about my cobalt orbs
that was so good, he was immediately picked up by a major publishing company.
He'll be dedicating his first collection to me.
He says that having me in his life is the next best thing to having a soul.
But, of course, I'd love him with or without the soul.
Only a totally superficial person would care about a little thing like that.
We take a trip to LA, where I sing for a demon named Lorne.
He can't read me because the strength of my powers cancels
out the abilities of everyone around me, but he does say that I
have the best voice in the world.
Mr. Giles also wants to train me as the youngest Watcher in history.
I may be young, but I look so mature for my age that
I can get served as many Cosmopolitans as I want at The Bronze.
One day Mr. Giles finds a prophecy that says a girl descended
from a nymph, a mermaid, a demon, a vampire, a centaur, and
a Latina actress would try and destroy the world.
And I totally almost do.
(AUTHORS NOTE: DON'T ASK HOW I KNOW THATI AM 'SHARELLE' IS DESCENDED FROM ALL THEEZ THNGZ. REEL LIFE IS BUS-Z AND I DONT HAV TEH TIME TO PAY ATTENTION TO ALL THOSE DE-TALES.)
But at the last minute, I turn into a super-Slayer warrior goddess and die saving the world instead.
My friends grieve . . . .
"Nooooooooooo!"
"Nooooooooooo!"
"Nooooooooooo!"
"Nooooooooooo!"
*sob*
But I enjoy some well-earned peace in Heeeeea-ven.
Of course, my friends can't live without me, so they bring me back.
I am sad and a little uncharacteristically unkempt for a while.
Then Spike shows me that life is worth living by
declaring his undying love and having lots of hot, sweaty sex with me.
I realize that I *totally* love him back! (A/N: "SPARELLE" 4-EVAH!!!11!!)
And I get my act together to save the world again
with my awesome, unparalleled powers.
Then I learn that I've had amnesia all this time and
I'm actually one of the Powers-That-Be!
Will I ascend? Or will I stay with my twu wuv Spike?
*gasp! ev0l cliffhanger!!*
(TO BE CONTINUED . . . BUT ONLY IF I GET 1,000,000 REVIEWS! I MEAN IT!!!!111!!!)
[Caps from the actual Buffy series are credited to the sites found at Freeze Frame.]
cleolinda. And since it's late – and I'm wide awake – I thought I'd put some goofiness together for your amusement.Mary Sue Meme
1. Go to the Elouai doll maker.
2. Make an ordinary doll of yourself and save it.
3. Take that doll and, leaving a couple things (nose, eyebrows, whatever) the same, Mary Sue yourself. Make the most blatant Mary Sue you can conceive.
4. Post "Before" and "After" in your LJ. Bonus points if your Sue has a back-story of some sort.
Well, all right!
So firstly, here's the dolly that more-or-less has my features. She's got my current thing for pink. And the hair, while a bit darker blonde than my natural shade, is basically close. Too bad not every day is a Sue-hair day!
And now, I shall give her a total Mary Sue makeover and send her on a Sunnydale adventure . . . .
Hi. My name is Sharelle, and all my life I've been an orphan.
For sixteen years, I never knew the love of a parent or a single friend.
Oh, woe. Woe!
My full name is actually Sharelle Papillion Morningstar Bonita
MahRee Soosan Rummi, which is written out (in very small letters)
on the back of the silver cross I always wear around my neck. It is my
only real possession, and my only clue as to who I really am.
I've always been a tomboy – as you can see by my spunky braids and
backwards cap – but I have a gentle soul and a heart of gold. I've
lived on the street all my life, with nothing to wear but a biohazard barrel.
But that all changed the day a man named Rupert Giles told me I was a Vampire Slayer.
Oh, look how well I clean up! My nicer clothes now enhance my
cerulean-winter-sky eyes and my sun-kissed golden hair tousled
luxuriously about my shoulders.
Mr. Giles tells me I'm a very different kind of Slayer.
Not only can I wield my weapons using only the sheer force of my mental will…
But I'm also way more studious than his other Slayers – Buffy and Faith.
He's already told me how much he admires the fact that I call him
Mr. Giles, and not just by his last name like some people he knows.
I've enrolled in classes at Sunnydale High, and Mr. Giles trains
me as a Slayer after school. However, he tells me that, since I'm
already an expert in just about every weapon in existence, he wants
me to help him train the other Slayers.
I get quite a reception from the student body on my first day.
(And my hair unexplainably changes color. I currently have
simmering titian tresses cascading down my back.) Buffy,
the other Slayer, asks to be my best friend.
The other students seem to feel the same way . . .
. . . and a girl named Cordelia instantly gives me her
position as captain of the cheerleading squad.
Oh, and have I mentioned my suave British accent?
Or the fact that nearly every guy in school wants to date me?
Including one boy named
who loves the fact that I'm not afraid of bunnies like his last girlfriend.
All this, and I still find time to pursue my career as a swimsuit model.
But, of course, my Slayer duties come first.
(I love finding new and innovative ways of hiding my stake.)
Yep, I don't take no guff when I'm Slaying.
Mr. Giles says he wishes Buffy embraced
her duty as much as I have.
Plus, I'm really great with children.
I also happen to be one of the most powerful witches in the world.
(In fact, I may have to travel as an exchange student for a
few weeks to do the requisite crossover at Hogwarts.
They would need someone with my abilities, after all.)
I can communicate with animals.
Probably because I'm part wood nymph…
and I have mermaid blood…
as well as demon…
and my mother may or may not have been J. Lo.
Yes, the specific details of my ancestry remain a mystery.
One thing is certain – I'm part vampire.
My great-great-great-great grandmother was almost sired
by a vampire, but she lived. And ever since then, women
in my family have certain vampire characteristics, but none
of their weaknesses. I have ruby-red eyes instead of yellow;
I don't get bumpies on my face like most vampires; I'm also
immune to sunlight, crosses, and holy water.
In short: I'm still darn cute.
Faith didn't trust me at first, so she staked me through the heart.
But I lived because of my super-accelerated healing powers.
Now we're, like, best friends.
In fact, I'm the only one she relates to, and I'm the only
one who can keep her in line.
She even lets me borrow her clothes. (Although I usually make my own.)
I recently started dating Spike. He likes it when I dress like this,
and he says my copious glimmering tresses are the closest
he's been to actual sunlight in over a century.
After he met me, he started writing poetry about my cobalt orbs
that was so good, he was immediately picked up by a major publishing company.
He'll be dedicating his first collection to me.
He says that having me in his life is the next best thing to having a soul.
But, of course, I'd love him with or without the soul.
Only a totally superficial person would care about a little thing like that.
We take a trip to LA, where I sing for a demon named Lorne.
He can't read me because the strength of my powers cancels
out the abilities of everyone around me, but he does say that I
have the best voice in the world.
Mr. Giles also wants to train me as the youngest Watcher in history.
I may be young, but I look so mature for my age that
I can get served as many Cosmopolitans as I want at The Bronze.
One day Mr. Giles finds a prophecy that says a girl descended
from a nymph, a mermaid, a demon, a vampire, a centaur, and
a Latina actress would try and destroy the world.
And I totally almost do.
(AUTHORS NOTE: DON'T ASK HOW I KNOW THAT
But at the last minute, I turn into a super-Slayer warrior goddess and die saving the world instead.
My friends grieve . . . .
"Nooooooooooo!"
"Nooooooooooo!"
"Nooooooooooo!"
"Nooooooooooo!"
*sob*
But I enjoy some well-earned peace in Heeeeea-ven.
Of course, my friends can't live without me, so they bring me back.
I am sad and a little uncharacteristically unkempt for a while.
Then Spike shows me that life is worth living by
declaring his undying love and having lots of hot, sweaty sex with me.
I realize that I *totally* love him back! (A/N: "SPARELLE" 4-EVAH!!!11!!)
And I get my act together to save the world again
with my awesome, unparalleled powers.
Then I learn that I've had amnesia all this time and
I'm actually one of the Powers-That-Be!
Will I ascend? Or will I stay with my twu wuv Spike?
*gasp! ev0l cliffhanger!!*
(TO BE CONTINUED . . . BUT ONLY IF I GET 1,000,000 REVIEWS! I MEAN IT!!!!111!!!)
[Caps from the actual Buffy series are credited to the sites found at Freeze Frame.]
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 07:25 am (UTC)I love you, Sharelle Papillion Morningstar Bonita MahRee Soosan Rummi.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 04:21 pm (UTC)*nods*
(PS -- Love ya, too! *smooch!* Glad you were amused!)
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 04:50 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 07:29 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 04:22 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 09:14 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 04:25 pm (UTC)*HUGS*
(I couldn't resist the "censored" scene!)
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 01:43 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 04:27 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 01:52 pm (UTC)U R de BEST Mary Sue EVAH!
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 04:34 pm (UTC)Glad you got a laugh from it, dear!
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 04:39 pm (UTC)That was hilarious. The author notes randomly stuck in were a nice touch.
Also, lots of fun was had while playing with the dollies...
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 04:45 pm (UTC)I'm happy it made you giggle. (And those dollies can be scary-addicting . . . which was probably obvious! Hee!)
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 05:22 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 05:34 pm (UTC)But don't worry. I can always bring you back with my wondrous powers of resurrection.
(So happy you liked! *G*)
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-06 07:27 pm (UTC)*giggles again* You give me too many ideas. Too much fun, Sharelle. Too much fun!
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 08:21 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-07 04:37 am (UTC)(and, you forgot the part about winning the Nobel Prize for your trans-dimensial sub-atomic surfactant and the Pulitzer for your expose` on the Quentin Travers' embezzlement of funds from the Council of Watchers.)
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 08:24 pm (UTC)Oh, and I may need a beta for chapter three -- where I become Queen of the Universe. Interested? :)
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-07 04:46 am (UTC)Seriously though...toping that? Not anytime soon. LOL
I can't really do this anyhoo, 'cause of the 'making a version of you'...'cause they don't have like chunky girls there. LOL
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 08:29 pm (UTC)Like the song says:
"Every 'Sue' is sacred; every 'Sue' is good; every 'Sue' is needed, in your neighborhood!"
(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 03:34 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-08 08:32 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-17 10:15 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-08-17 10:20 pm (UTC)I'll be thinking of you. *many hugs*
(no subject)
Date: 2007-02-13 08:53 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-02-13 10:15 pm (UTC)I didn't know you had an LJ. Would you mind if I friended you?
(no subject)
Date: 2007-02-14 10:14 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-02-19 04:42 pm (UTC)But, of course, I'd love him with or without the soul.
Only a totally superficial person would care about a little thing like that.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!
That was the best!!
--Zak